My drive with a Pakistani... around Kashmir

Would you hold a potato to an adult and ask if it's a potato, without risking your sanity? Well, today a cabbie asked me, "Are you Indian?" Even a blind can figure the Indian in me...

I hailed this cab and the grumpy-looking driver's first question was my destination. The second, which followed no sooner than I answered the first, was confirming my nationality. He turned back and threw a more scorn-filled look in acknowledgment. The young chap was silent for about 2 minutes, studying me through his rear-view mirror.

He turned and announced without ado, "I am from Pakistani Kashmir."

"Okay."

He continued looking at me through the mirror. His eyes bitter, yelling a hundred withheld emotions. Whoever said eyes speak, is so right!

"It's a beautiful place." I said.

He turned and queried with visible hatred, "Which place?"

"Kashmir," I said.

"Your government doesn't let us live in peace. Everyday killing. Only my mother and sister live there. So I moved them to another place, 21kms inside."

I smiled in reply. And received more scorn.

"You are a responsible son." I tried.

He didn't thaw. Instead, crinkled his brows in contempt.

I remained quiet for a few minutes and then tried again, "I have many Pakistani friends."

Now he turned back, possibly to take a new look at me, when I said, "They are all so nice people."

He nodded. "People are nice, madam. Politicians are causing problems."

I smiled. And lo!, the cabbie smiled too.

Then, there was no stopping him. He took a u-turn, changed the route to bypass traffic, shared with me his sister's experience at taking a driving licence, how he completed his graduation, how he loves Anil Kapoor and Akshay Kumar, how crazy his dad was about Amitabh Bachchan...up until how he's now waiting for an interview call from Dnata as he is tired of driving.

At the end of the 40-minute drive, the handsome chap [yep, once he shed his grumpiness, he was a cute fellow] refused to take the full fare.

"Not all customers speak, madam. You are educated that's why you speak differently..." He gave me his reasons.

I gave him mine. How his company demands he fulfill his target and how every fil matters at the month-end.

At last, he let me get-off only after I promised that I will ride with him again.


"On full discount, madam."

"Full discount! what's that? In all these years, I've not heard of discounts on taxi rides!"

"I will not switch on the meter madam," he explained and shared his mobile number.

God Bless him!

PS: A few words spoken with the right intention will work wonders!

Leave bedroom talks under the quilt...Couple's private talk stokes nation's ire

In today's Hitavada issue

I have always been curious to peep into a celebrity’s normal day at home. Do they do their dishes, cut veggies, clean the toilet, water plants, do laundry…like we normal mortals?

Long last, Aamir and Kiran opened their home to show me they have husband-wife conversations like in any common household...But my starving countrymen are all pouncing over one another to prove who’s best at interpreting what the star-couple’s private conversation means.

Aamir also said a few other lines apart from the ‘India-leaving’ sentence. ‘Kiran feels scared to open the newspapers everyday’… ‘I am alarmed by the number of incidents…’ Why isn’t anyone interested in those? He definitely didn’t say it for the 2-minute fame. However, the same cannot be said about all those reacting?


How many of those hollering their epiglottis out would sit munching popcorn with their feet up if their child doesn’t return home on time from campus?


How many moral polices will laze under the covers if they do not hear from their kids who stay afar from them?

It was a mother’s concern for her baby’s future that Kiren voiced to her husband. Yes, as a celebrity he should have censored that when on a public forum. Because public figures ought to speak responsibly, so as “not to stoke unrest”. But shouldn’t they speak their mind? Else, why speak.


Yes, as a celebrity he should have censored that when on a public forum


Again, always a personal story helps you connect with the audience quicker. It helps drive home the point easily. And bigger the personality, the quicker it gets soaked in.

Think of this… if a celebrity [read with all his clout to ensure protection] feels vulnerable about the incidents in the country, what about the common man? It’s not about a Khan, or Jain or Robert here. The least we as a nation could do is to exercise tolerance in our reaction. National prime time wasted on such comments, was the most disgraceful part of the issue. One channel host took a lesson citing the number of times in the past India has risen above troubles all by themselves unlike France…

Yes, we are one proud nation. We do not wait for another to help us get on our feet. We are able, capable and far better than any others on this planet. We’re the epitome of diversity and pluralism!!

And that’s exactly why we need to halt spewing our mirth and check why off late such talks are being heard frequently?

Earlier, Shah Rukh Khan came under fire for his remarks on intolerance and BJP leader Kailash Vijayvargiya called him 'anti-national’. There’s no dearth of elected representatives exposing their filthy minds off. If the nation can let them pass, why pounce on celebrities?

Little wonder Indian celebrities don’t take part in discussing serious national issues unlike in the West. We believe they are public property and it’s we who provide them our share of oxygen to help them earn their keep. Isn’t that why Aamir’s entire body of work of all these years was rubbished in a day?

We as a nation consider it our birth right to own our celebrities. So they better walk on our leash. Else this is what we do, tighten the noose. And then if the outside media talks of what we do on our turf, we rise up in arms lecturing them on secularism and diversity and democracy… and take them to ‘our’ Mahatma Gandhi and Buddha, too.

It’s extremely sad that the Constitutionally-granted Freedom of Speech is today tagged with an unwritten clause of the citizen’s station, his/her political allegiance and religious beliefs. Dr Ambedkar would be turning in his grave!

Hope Aamir has learnt his lesson… to leave bedroom talks under the quilt! 

WhatsApp suckers

The word ‘troll’ I assumed was only associated with fishing. As in fishing in the waters for those aquatic creatures, until I discovered nothing-worthwhile-to-do vertebrates who fish for celebrity slips in the virtual world are also called trolls.

Bollywood’s very own Alia Bhatt introduced me to the word through her infamous faux pas recently. Am I a late bloomer? Possibly. Am not too high on matters of tech. Now, I consciously have stopped forwarding Alia jokes that come my way. Enough of passive trolling!

Pls do not respond if you do not have anything to add of value 

My action is thus, also because I’ve had enough of another similar breed that’s usurped my mobile - WhatsApp pleasers! Someone please name them!

This is the number of messages that waited my attention in 12 hours

They are more prevalent in professional groups, than friendly or family groups. In common parlance on any given day you may want to call them arselickers.

I’m a member of at least five such groups. In my best moods, I find it hilarious. Their activity starts long before sunrise, replying to ‘Good Morning’ thought-of-the-day posters. From icons of varied sorts to folded hands, thumps-up of left thumb, right thumb, claps, victory sign… smileys and hands-up of one hand, two hands… So far so good. It doesn’t stop there, they key in – ‘Well said’. Good thought’….

And if anyone in the group were to share a hot news or an opinion piece [that doesn’t pertain to the group’s normal activity], then I mute my mobile. “Thanks for the info XX”; “XX thanks for sharing”; “XX very informative,”; “wow, wow, woo captivating XX”; “XX appreciate your thought about sharing” [what the !!!!  they think about his thought, too].

If the person forwarding is a senior, then every single member in the group will post their acknowledgement.

Now, this takes the cake. I read this the other day in one of my groups. “Will surely find time to read it XX, Tks. It’s fab”! Without reading the person knows it’s fab. MORON!

It doesn’t stop there. The original forwarder replies to this with hugs, tears, kisses, lols… And each time the mobile alerts you.

However, when a controversial news is posted on professional groups, reactions are guarded… “Oh”; “Um”. Yet they cannot hold from reacting.  

The least you could do is stop the round-robin 

This is one of the banes of social media. Of course, the worst being moral policing and virtual arraignment. But then, that’s serious stuff that the community and world media trolls on.

I’m more concerned about the trolling that creeps into my bedroom. I’ve missed many important calls and delayed replying to numerous messages because of these Whatsapp arselickers. I’m forced to RIP my device during peak hours.

Well, requesting 'pleasers' to stop their virtual activity will take a lot more effort. The least you could do is stop the round-robin. Old posts, which had collected its share of smileys and hugs and thanks, again being forwarded a few days later by someone from the same group and the same chain of reaction continuing all over again. PLEASE! somebody throw them in the ocean!

At least check before you forward. Have you read it before, have you forwarded the same? And for Pete’s sake do not respond if you do not have anything to add of value.

Can’t wait for Whattsapp to begin charging for the service, at least such suckers will think twice before reacting.

Meanwhile, someone please name them! 

BTW...adjectives overflow, too. Here's a classic one..."Xcelent msg XX, worth emulating, reproductive... 

Isn't this the hottest news ever...You may blame WhatsApp for surprise pregnancies! 

Don't tear your hair out yet.

Peception & belief!

Bollywood movie 'Shamitabh' may or may not have affected careers of the film's cast and crew. But it definitely has affected some perceptions I had of my career.

A few that I held close with fear I have discarded with a determination never to let it haunt me. And one belief that I had silently nurtured, I hold on to with all vigour!

The below screenshots of my blogposts are self explanatory.

The 1st picture below is a screen shot of my review on Amitabh Bachchan's FB page exactly one week after he posted it. Humbled to see the number of likes, shares and comments. 

This 2nd picture below is a screenshot of Big B's FB page post that I shared on my wall. Received 'congratulatory' comments and likes from 'my' friends. 

This 3rd picture below is the screenshot of the original blogpost I had shared on my Facebook page well before Big B chose to feature it. More than a week later, it still awaits its first reader.

In gratitude always. Thanks to the Divine, I will continue doing what I love.

Shamitabh - will be celebrated

An intelligently crafted film - the ultimate ode to Big B! It’s a critic’s feast. A novel idea wrapped with filmdom obsession, which is technically sound, well-orchestrated and superbly enacted.

Well, the director-writer could have busted the ego of his protagonists quicker to save viewers from the drag in between. That could have possibly helped reviewers stretch the colour a little across the three stars, too. But what the heck? It’s ego that the director is trying to quell. Does it die in one hack.

Raters seem lost on rungs to grade the movie. They aren’t quite sure how to rate a creation that neither came with a promise to challenge the 100crore club nor falls under the starry Bolly-entertainer and yet flaunting the biggest star.

So unlike librarians who place a book under the ‘general’ category when they can’t identify the genre, critics for want of an acceptable code, is all over the place.

And so 'Shamitabh' has become nothing but Balki's obsession with Amitabh Bachchan… why do we need to hear the baritone bass and Big B’s history in Bollywood after all these decades… is the technology for real…over two-and-a-half hours of ego ride…to a debutante’s attempt to act and who’s that guy, ah! Danush, good…

E...shed it guys, let go. Give credit to the man who dares to be different in an industry that runs with the crowd and sings chorus. We are used to pulling up and sticking out those who perform differently.

In this case, it's the expectation of novelty from the creator of ‘Paa’ and ‘Cheeni Kum’ that's weighing the movie down.

At least give it to the actors. Danush's performance is electric, not to mention Bachchan at his superb best. Newcomer Akshara comes across as Papa’s daughter. Hope the fraternity gives her the space to grow. Okay, I learnt that dialogue delivery is genetic, as well.

This is one movie that will be celebrated only after Amitabh Bachchan gives his last shot – which future generations will refer to when Big B is studied!

Every dog has its day…today!

The Financial World published this on June 18 under the title 'What makes News in this viral world?'

But I prefer the doggy title...

....because as you see even I've had my days...



 

‘Dog bites man’ is not News. ‘Man bites dog’ makes News. So I was taught and I have been following diligently until the virus corrupted my sense of judgment. I woke up to the fact the ‘man biting dog’ can be insipid in this age, because every dog is having its day. If you thought one is worth his salt a pinch more, you will regret having formed an opinion too early. The viral world doesn’t let you see a pattern, forget setting one.

If you thought something did well and attempted at mimicking the same you will be left chewing the bone. Alone. You never know what word or action will catch the fancy of billions. Any idea why Psy’s Gangnam style got infants and the aged alike to lift their feet? When our very own Kolaveri happened, I thought better of it. But now with the Korean going bonkers, I prefer our Tamil beats. May be it’s got to do with native virus in my ears that’s hung itself.

One suicide has caught the fancy of the whole nation, whose many citizens opt for similar endings for, again, similar alleged reasons. Yet Jiah Khan and her boy of afriend have captured curious public interest. Probably it was the heart-felt note that was uploaded for public viewing that did the trick. So, will another high profile suicide with a love-torn note create such frenzy. No betting on that!

When IPL scandal exploded in multi-colours and cricket lovers gave up in sighed resignation, one player sprung up more popular for reasons other than the alleged case. His Dawood Ibrahim jeans! Trust underworld to make light of issues? You may end up counting stars, if yours are not aligned right.

Attempt speaking about the bombs that blasted in 1993; add as many gory and insensitive adjectives and adverbs to the incident, and you will still have people groping for the connect. But open with Sanjay Dutt and emotions, reactions and actionswill explode unto you that you will regret even having mentioned it. The actor has covered the real faces behind the blast. Wanna stress home the futility point in an unfortunate incident by using glamorous face in future. By all means, at your own risk!

In fact, risk is the only constant in today’s times when success is defined not by how much of what you possess rather by how much of what you possess is out at what speed. The secret to the risk is, just let go. Even those umms, aahs, uhhs and eeks… record them all. They may just about click the senses of a billion.

Jiah Khan killed over and over again

Courtesy: TFW

So it’s a week since Bollywood starlet Jiah Khan’s untimely death. And she has been killed several times over since last Monday. Every time a journo decides to write a hypothetical analysis comparing her end to stars who committed suicide in the past, she is mercilessly killed yet again.

So what if the girl’s family and friends are just steadying themselves up from the shock of her demise? Media was headlong into cashing in on Jiah Khan’s death, gleeful that headlines and eyeballs for the following few days has been taken care of.

Indeed, media should inform. It was a young talent that has gone waste. And if the case warranties investigation and when the same is concluded by competent authorities, then the results should be splashed across.

But no! There was alcohol and anti-depressants put into her system and work pressure and depression measured in her cells. Alright, there can’t be smoke without fire. So let the media get the benefit of doubt, but shouldn’t they keep the reasons across the table for someone in the know of things to speak.

Agreed only those who ‘Break’ News can keep up with the heat of competition and survive, but isn’t there something called ethics? ‘We were the first to report about who found her hanging…’; ‘We were the first to report about the suicide note…’; We were the first to write about the boy whom she last spoke to….’ It’s not an unprecedented trip to Jupiter that warranties exclusive watermarks. PLEASE!

The breaking news phenomenon, unfortunately, is not confined to mainstream media alone. All and sundry today want to break into two-seconds of fame. Legendary singer Manna Dey, who is hospitalized, was mercilessly RIP-ped by Tweeps, before his doctor tweeted his “condition is stable at the moment”.

Sad, but true, if disastrous incidents make News, then celebrities’ pathos and plights make bigger News. But that’s catering to public interest at large. So be it. But we sure can exercise more conscientiousness and stop being ruthless savages. Consider these comparative stories that made headlines riding on Jiah Khan’s coffin. Like Jiah Khan… List of celebrities who died young; List of Bollywood dreams gone sour; List of little known wonders who had spoken of depression; List of those made eternal by suicide…PATHETIC!

Cashing-in on someone’s death is a form of cannibalism!

Bollywood or cricket... we are like this only!

Hope, awe, shock and sighs! This is what two mastermind religions of Indians put us through in the last few days. Mastermind as in that which restricts the mind by ruling our heart!



Graphic Courtesy: The Financial World

Bollywood stars are using the French Riviera and our cricketers the IPL banner to connect with their devotees, while their ardent followers who can kill one another for a drop of a hoot or catch were left wanting for less. Literally!

Bowled over by new fixes, brows and eyes and even heels were raised at the TV screens when the three cricketers were walked into custody in black hoods. Couldn’t we have done with less of those shots? Again, with all and sundry voicing their opinion on any platform, [even kids in the park asked to react] it certainly is an overdose of information. But then we are Indians. We are like this only!

Within minutes after the news was out, people were calling for life bans and jail terms for the accused players. Once again questioning the BCCI, connecting the dots to the underworld and zeroing in on the players’ families. “So how do you feel at this moment?” asked reporters pressing mikes into their mouths as the cameras zoomed in on their faces. How does it help anyone to know how they feel?

At least let the first 24 hours tide over, if we cannot wait for the investigations to be complete. Let’s hear the accused. If found guilty, allow the law to take its course. But no! We are like this only! If we are sad, we howl; if we are happy, we scream and if we are hurt, we will not nurse our bruises in silence.

But silent we do fall like the Mexican wave that dies out to rise again. Match-fixing ritual has been an integral part of this sport since long. BCCI has been cozying at the helm all through. The underworld was also very much under the same world. Only that everything was brushed aside as the wave passed on and those involved preened themselves up and emotional followers wowed.

Consider this. A month back cameras were focused on Sanjay Dutt and his conviction. The actor’s every gesture including the twitch of his facial muscle that held his tear drop was recorded and re-played by the hour. Media and anyone who was reminded of the blast aftermath commented on his past, present and future. And then, when the time arrived - when he actually did walk into jail - we let him be. The cameras were busy chasing cricketers and other Bollywood stars at the Cannes.

And what are we interested in at the Cannes? Fashion! One of our men Anurag Kashyap will receive the Knight of The Order of Arts and Letters for his efforts in promoting Indian cinema globally, but he is buried amid the fashionistas.

Image courtesy: Emirates24|7

Apparently carried away by the spirit of the centennial of Indian cinema, our stars that went abroad crossed boundaries, literally. Vidya Balan’s anarkali with a veil, or the saree with multi-coloured accessories; Sonam Kapoor’s humongous diamond nose ring or the voluminous floral gown; Big B’s shimmering suit and that bath-robe of an outfit…isn’t that stretching the fashion sense a 100 yards too long to make statements at a global event?

No. Not one bit, because we Indians love bling. When we celebrate we go all out. We are like this only!

Iron Lady - who's that?

[This appeared in TFW on April 16]

Margaret Thatcher’s funeral today has become a contentious issue, challenging the government. No woman in the recent past has triggered such hate posts in her demise.

She was a woman who stood for what she believed was right even in the face of opposition. The fact that she was a woman of substance, irrespective of whether her beliefs were right, wrong or fatal, is what intrigues me the most when I see the reactions to her death.

Indeed, a tough lady. For only a strong-willed woman can evoke such interest. Isn’t our very own Iron Lady – Indira Gandhi - still passionately debated and discussed almost three decades after her assassination.

Interestingly, even Irom Chanu Sharmila has been referred to by the same title by a section of the populace. Good to learn the crusader has been conferred some recognition. Otherwise, her fast and cause are hardly covered by the mainstream media.

She turned 40 this week. Did anyone care? Well, if a Bollywood director makes a biopic and, only, if only, it crosses the Rs100 crore mark [given that the figure is the latest blockbuster benchmark], then the national media would play up her cause. Oops! would mention her cause and play up the actress who essayed her character.

The woman has devoted more than 12 prime years of her life to have the Armed Forces Special Powers Act repealed. Anyone listening! And all she got is a title Iron Lady.

Graphic Courtesy: The Financial World

Though the term was first used by the Soviet Union to mock Margaret Thatcher, it has been conveniently used by all to address their own women who speak their mind throwing caution to the wind, who squash their opponents like flies on the wall and who is despised...may I say even in death?

Aung San Suu Kyi is also termed an Iron Lady of her country, commanding world respect. Hatred she does breed in some quarters, but has not 'ironed out' her opposers yet. Can we draw parallels with Irom , who is tossed between hospital cells and court rooms, letting her restraints communicate louder.

But unlike Irom, Suu Kyi got a platform. Hope the authorities pay heed to the Manipuri's cause before it is too late...And we re-define the title Iron Lady. Resurrect the name and cloak it in democratic colours.

Meanwhile, may Lady Thatcher's soul rest in peace. She is sure to go down history books as the longest serving woman prime minister. That, indeed, is no soft task.

 

Spare a thought for Sanjay Dutt’s children

If you err you face the consequence. And when the highest court of law in a country sentences an individual, the person ought to humbly accept. Period. So should it be. But the emotional vortex the verdicts unleash within the loved ones of the affected unsettling their lives is indescribable.

So is it with all the number of people convicted in the 1993 Bombay blasts, including actor Sanjay Dutt. But when a celebrity is punished, the national interest it generates is immense. Unfortunately, it can be more harmful for the family than the jail term for the individual.

Petitions seeking Dutt’s pardon are forwarded to the competent authorities; movers and shakers are all over social media voicing their solidarity, an ex-Supreme Court judge has taken his plea to the highest office, not to mention his innumerable fans who pray and fast and curse… all citing that he has suffered enough.

There are yet others who are opposed to any leniency, asking ‘then why not others?’

Why? Why such hallabaloo even after the actor has announced he will surrender on April 18. He’s being a man.

Let’s not be hypothetical in our attack or support. Give him a chance by respecting his decision. He owes it to his children, for Pete’s sake!

Imagine all these hateful words of defamation, sympathetic display of support and zooming close-ups of him at his most vulnerable moments documented for posterity!

If at all anyone cares to continue speaking about Sanjay Dutt, they should do it for his family. For his two innocent toddlers who are unaware of what’s happening around. For his wife, the woman who needs to carry on each day without support and worse still protecting her children from the current media glare and upholding their dad’s stature.

This is a stigma the kids will carry, irrespective of whether Dutt serves the remainder of his jail term or receives a pardon. A pedigree tainted by prison records!

The fact that Dutt’s name is taken in congruence with the 1993 blasts, even when the Supreme Court has acquitted him of terror charges, convicting him only for illegal possession of arms, is pathetic.

No punishment is bigger than one's inability of being there for their children. Media reports allege that Sanjay Dutt cannot travel to countries that deny visas for the convicted, which includes the US, where his eldest child lives. But at least she is witness to the happenings and old enough to sieve through the interpretations.
 
Imagine the two toddlers, who will have to do it on documented information when they grow up.

Time is a great healer. For all you know, Dutt will walk out a hero! He has done it on previous occasions. Pray he does it again - this time for his kids!

[Picture Couertesy: www.sanjay-dutt.info]